


Abrasax Queen Snowed-In Nightmare: Salacious Tell-All!

by Xidaer



Series: The Restless Sun Intergalactic Tabloid [1]
Category: Jupiter Ascending (2015)
Genre: Brief descriptions of smut, F/M, Post-Canon, Press and Tabloids, Secret Santa, Tabloids, jupiter ascending secret santa 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-26 21:26:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17149364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xidaer/pseuds/Xidaer
Summary: A trashy intergalactic tabloid, The Restless Sun, has the scoop of the century when an unnamed source in Jupiter Jones' entourage spills all the details about her and her family being trapped on an ice planet in a vacation gone wrong.





	Abrasax Queen Snowed-In Nightmare: Salacious Tell-All!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ItsClydeBitches](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItsClydeBitches/gifts).



> Set 5 years after movie canon, this story is to fulfill a prompt from the 2018 Jupiter Ascending Secret Santa; "Jupiter, family, snowed in"

Abrasax Queen Snowed-In Nightmare: Salacious Tell-All!

Since shutting down production of her portion of the RegeneX empire and declaring her many harvest worlds off-limits to other would-be upstarts in the market, Jupiter Jones, aka the fierce recurrence of Seraphi Abrasax, has been a regular in the pages of The Restless Sun. She's been beyond stressed with her veritable war on her child turned friend Kalique Abrasax who cornered the shattered Nectar market the moment Jupiter made her shocking and unprecedented declaration. Kalique's bid for dominance has been further helped by her share of the long awaited final settlement from the death of the first primary of the House of Abrasax, Balem. Ubiquitously known as an unstable but shrew tyrant, Balem's death was met with nothing but sighs of relief and greedy expectation from the alcazars of Entitled everywhere, especially his feckless and famed party-boy brother Titus Abrasax. After slogging through years of deliberation, the Commonwealth Ministry, that noxious intergalactic hub for bureaucracy and administration, finally ruled on the dual matter of Balem's estate and Titus' attempted regicide leading to Titus' banishment to the deadlands and more importantly the rift between Kalique and Jupiter with the division of both the brothers' properties.

With all that swirling over her head, it's no wonder that our readers' favorite spitfire, Jupiter, decided to take her whole family on a lengthy vacation from her trials and tribulations. 

Our unnamed source in the Queen's entourage has given The Restless Sun an exclusive scoop of that vacation turned nightmare. Their party followed Jupiter's whim for snow and launched off to one of Titus' mothballed alcazars nestled high in the alps of Elsa, a planet notorious for its snowy winter months. Instead of a winter wonderland, an impenetrable ice storm struck the poorly maintained pleasure dome in the first week, knocking out the communications. With no way to alert the Aegis of their plight, they were stuck until the scheduled pick-up time six excruciating weeks later. But why do we say excruciating? That initial storm was a harbinger of more to come and greater hardships for the Queen and family to endure. 

Her consort, Caine Wise, the half albino lycantant splice, was not engineered for cold unlike Jupiter who kept saying she was used to it from Chicago (and Russian blood she noted, whatever that means). The couple left their children in the arms of the android nannies as they bundled up to perform the manual labor of cleaning snow off the solar generators. Those generators were found not only covered in snow but, to add injury to insult, cracked under a thick coating of ice! Now, with limited power reserves and a generator limping along becoming more damaged with every passing storm, the Queen and her consort had to turn off the necessary luxuries to which so many Entitled are accustomed. Anti-gravity beds, heated pools, the holographic theater; all shut down. "At least," her Majesty said with a shrug, "there's a lot of old firewood," a contrivance that the now imprisoned Titus Abrasax had set aside for his ancient chimney-pillared fire pits (such a sense of style that play boy had!) 

Screaming Tantrums and Cleaning Queens!  
While we'd previously called Jupiter's children 'half-breed spawn' in years passed, now the two Royal kiddos have wormed their way into our collective hearts. The one-year-old babe in arms, Michael, and his older sister, Serafina, (now a four year old toddler) at first thought the winter a fun adventure; running around in the snow, driving their mother and nannies to distraction with their antics. But as the storms wore on and the pair were forced to give up the those aforementioned necessary luxuries not to mention trips outside into the snow, their boredom grew and tensions started running high. There were screaming crying breakdowns and temper tantrums from our little Serafina, especially at the discovery of Jupiter’s less than royal past. "We all pitched in on Earth [Jupiter's original harvest world], and we'll all pitch in here," Jupiter said. When our princess stamped her feet and refused? Well, she and our source got an earful of her Majesty's less than royal upbringing.

Apparently, Seraphi Abrasax' recurrence started life not as the cream of the harvest crop, but as a lowly household maid- cleaning, dusting, and making beds for the lesser 'entitled' of the harvest world. What with the lack of automation on that backwards planet she hailed from it's no wonder it was set for the kindness of early reaping. Jupiter had been on her knees scrubbing lavatories for almost half her life before her genetic print was discovered and verified. Serafina was shocked at this admission- Anyone would be what with Jupiter being renown for using her time to champion the rights of splices and studiously absorb the new changes to intergalactic tax code (so many of which Kalique has been using in their battle for control over the direction of the RegeneX empire). Tantrums were soundly ended in that if Caine and Jupiter had to clean generators, Serafina would have to work with the entourage to kept the usable rooms of the alcazar tidy and fresh. 

The Salacious!  
Things were not just crying children and daily sweeping of the solar generators. Once the children were in bed and their android nannies were charging, it was time to turn the lights down low. Even after five years together, the Queen and her consort were still banging against every piece of furniture in the alcazar! Our source spied them doing everything from christening the kitchen counter to Caine lifting Jupiter half up the wall to link her legs over his powerful lycantant shoulders, worshiping his Majesty's apparently tasty sex. It was not all wild and passionate love making, sweet nothings were whispered and important discussions were had in those dark secluded hours. Beyond the conflict with Kalique, the most astonishing of all the discussions was the potential for another pregnancy! It seems our Regent is following in Seraphi's footsteps, wanting at least 3 children if not more- although she's not waiting hundreds of years between each one. The revelation was further compounded when Jupiter straddled her consort on the couch and said, "Let's put more planning into this one...," letting slip that their first spawn was an accident! Oh dear Restless Sun reader, if that's not the scoop of the century, we don't know what is!

The Aftermath  
The whole affair ended as suddenly as the storms sprung up, picked up by the Aegis at the appointed time. The Queen is decommissioning the alcazar and vows never to set foot on Elsa again. Reportedly there is no love lost between Caine and the children for snow or the snowy world.


End file.
